I have not drank or used drugs for, let’s see, six years, maybe. It’s been about six and a half years since I’ve had anything like a controlled substance or any alcohol. My sobriety date is February 25, 2017, so I guess a couple months shy of two years.

How to Stay Sober

And the more time I spent working on what had caused me to be a drunk in the first place, the less afraid I was of that particular ghost returning. Ninety percent of the people I was hanging out with just vanished. You know, I look to my heroes to be reminded that really good, really smart, really talented people can fall into this trap pretty easily, far down the road, if they’re not careful. This is sobriety number one for me. This is my first foray into absolute sobriety, and so, no, I have not. And also it’s natural, and it has so many healing properties.

Before I became sober, I thought I was funnier when I was drunk or high. Does it leave you feeling more whole or emptier than before? What role does it play in your life?

Identify Your Personal Triggers

Connection to a community is a deep human need, one that I think becomes even more important when in recovery. I had just given all my power away to the alcoholic mind, which was pretty much a dictator. And you’re just, “Oh boy, look at that…” Just fleeting moments, and an emotional anxiety that went along with it. The alcohol dreams go away after a while, or at least they slow down. They seem so lucid, that I’m actually breaking sobriety, that when I wake up, I’m shocked that that wasn’t reality.

Why is ‘-ed’ sometimes pronounced at the end of a word?

“I think there’s so much value in reminding people that they can change the trajectory of their lives.”—Julien Baker It’s definitely the most difficult thing I’ve ever done in my life. I don’t really know how to describe it in a few sentences. And I want my life to have meaning.”

I don’t think there were any bands that even knew what sober was. I would do a little bit of cocaine or some painkillers to sober myself up so I could drink some more. And yeah, I did some drugs, but usually that was just to keep drinking.

How common is relapse?

When would serious be a good substitute for sober? The words sedate and sober can be used in similar contexts, but sedate implies a composed and decorous seriousness. When could sedate be used to replace sober?

My whole life and identity and my daily cycle of being alive for five years, or whatever, was just wrapped up in drugs. I feel like I’ve had bad nights or destructive nights or nights where I don’t remember anything or nights where I was seriously injured or seriously in danger. I know a lot of people who struggled with addiction had that.

If you have a chain saw in a hotel, you don’t really need to use it. I didn’t really use it but once or twice. All I know is, I could feel its presence in an ominous, daunting way that was preventing me from being my higher self. At least hard drugs, you have to have a dealer. Keith Moon was a very good friend, and it was so much fun hanging out with him—we just did whatever his alcoholic mind said was a can you overdose on kratom good idea. Things that would bring me down and things that would make me feel less.

It hurts my head to talk about this stuff, but it’s true. If I got sober, the Eagles would be back together. I don’t think I would have done it—I certainly wouldn’t have done it at that point—if it hadn’t been for her. So that was my first real motivation to get sober. And I would start a tour, and by set break of the first show, there would be 30 people in my band room and it would all come back.

I need intimacy in everything I do—I need things to feel vulnerable and connected. To me it’s like, I just came here because Radiohead was headlining, you know? And I make it this whole like dramatic thing of being “Get me the fuck out of here—I don’t want to be around that energy at all.” It’s so draining for me. laughs But I also don’t want to work with them. I don’t do anything—there’s nothing you can do.

  • I smoked weed for the very first time when I was 28.
  • In my teen years, I discovered alcohol, and that made me feel really good—I really relaxed and settled down and paid more attention to things.
  • People where I come from don’t use drugs in a recreational sense.
  • If you have a chain saw in a hotel, you don’t really need to use it.
  • Substance use is complicated for anyone, but in the LGBTQ community—especially among gay men—it’s layered.

There’s More Than One Way to Get Sober

I stopped food addiction and alcohol all at once—vegan, gluten-free, no processed food, no sugar, no alcohol, no caffeine, overnight. On top of being addicted to alcohol, I was also bulimic. It wasn’t the hardest thing I’ve ever been through—it’s not as hard as childhood, for example—but it’s harder than most things adults have to deal with. And I was even asking myself, “I wonder how soon I can get back to drinking…can I drink when I’m on antibiotics? But the addiction in your brain, that’s a tricky son of a bitch. That was not why people were hanging out with me.

Talk to your therapist, other healthcare provider, or sponsor about how to deal with your anger in ways that won’t cause you to harm yourself or others or turn to alcohol or drugs. Staying sober is a high priority, but developing and pursuing other goals can help you maintain that sobriety. A structured routine will help you achieve other goals in your life, whether they are short-term (like being on time for work) or long-term (like going back to school and changing careers).

Music

  • So the fact that I just dove headfirst into my work gave me an opportunity to actually document, in real time, the changes that I was going through.
  • And another member of our touring party had also shit himself in his sleep in the course of the night, and I didn’t know this yet.
  • Now I hang out in bars all the time because I’m more self-confident and more self-assured in my identity and I feel like I don’t need those things, so I don’t mind if they’re around.

Some people can get sober when there’s a couple of bolts left on. You become addicted, it’s something you do all the time, and suddenly it starts influencing your greatness. But I wasn’t stable, and I didn’t have a whole lot of joy. I felt like that’s what life was about. Or that’s what people around me were doing. I think it’s probably just resultant of shame and embarrassment and not wanting to be defined by the life that I used to live.

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Other Word Forms

But since really turning my life over to the program, et cetera, I have not. And that’s part of my story. Which just happened about four times in the last year. And it saddens me deeply when I see situations happen…other people in my field, for example, musicians who for some reason forgot what they were up against and ended up dead. The days and the months and the years are very important to me.

Sobriety doesn’t feel like giving something up—it feels like gaining what was lost. I told people I was “taking a month off” since I wasn’t confident yet, and peer pressure can be hard to resist. Numbing was easier than facing the parts of myself I didn’t yet want to see. I started noticing moments where I felt almost outside myself while drinking, like I was watching from a distance. If what she said was true, then every drink I took was a roll of the dice.